Well it has been over a month since I last saw my surgeon and we are still trying to get my insurance to cover a CT Scan, that so far they have denied over 3 times. I am really losing my patience, because I don't feel better, I do in some ways and do not at all in others.
I still can't function without pain pills, I still take them daily. I have little to no energy at all, even if I sleep for 10 hours. The pain in my groin still hurts and throbs daily, because of Sandy, my usual doctors appointments are thrown all out of whack and I will not get in to see them until December 4th.
I feel like a total and complete mess.
My younger brother bruised his spleen and was in the hospital this weekend in severe pain and he goes "Tammy I think I got a glimpse of how you feel every day this is the worst pain I have ever had, I don't know how you do it."
That made me feel a little better that he had some way of feeling the pain, not that I want him to be in pain, but either way it is so hard to describe to someone unless they have experienced extreme pain.
So the holidays are officially here, I made it through Thanksgiving I spent it here with friends, I decided not to travel. I will be traveling for Christmas so that is a whole new ball game and something I haven't done since the surgery.
I need strength and someday's I just don't know where I am going to get it from.
I will say I did have a great time going to the movies and doing some shopping with friends over the Holiday. One thing I have to be Thankful for is friends to lift me up when I am not doing so well and my health although it is not great, it is a little better than a year ago, so all I can do is continue to try and get better.
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