A long over due update

I just realized that I had not blogged about how things have been going since the surgery, that really speaks to my state of mind lately as I barely remember what day it is.

First off, I must say that I have absolutely wonderful and amazing friends, I really do not know what I would do without them. Going through this whole process alone is hard and to my friend Angela and her family who opened up their home to me and took me to appointments for close to two weeks, I really can't give enough thanks. Those first two weeks were so difficult, especially after I came down with the infection. Truthfully at that point all I wanted to do is cry. I am always in pain, but that truly took things over the top.

To my friend Terra who has been with me since and essential been my chauffeur to many appointments and making sure I have what I need while at home has been a huge help these past few weeks as well. I don't know what I am going to do when I am back on my own. Hopefully by then I have the strength and I am able to do things on my own. 

The surgery so far from what we can tell was successful. The doctor found a lot of scar tissue in the area and also one of my nerves that had separated into two nerves. They were able to properly decompress the nerves and now it is just an action of how the healing goes. 

Unfortunately a few days after the surgery I noticed a red area, that at first I thought I had just left the ice on a little too long. The next day I knew that was not the case as my entire leg was red. The next thing I knew my leg was so swollen I could not put my underwear on, which completely freaked me out. (nothing about surgery is glamorous that is for sure).

I spent about a week and a half down in the DC area, before I returned home. Since then I have had even more appointments between my specialist and my surgeon. The stitches are now out, however the wound is not healed so I am working daily to steri-strip it myself and make sure nothing happens to it. Thank goodness for my first aid training and slight background in athletic training. 

Frustration is a big word too. Everything gets to me because I can't do it. I can't pick things up off the ground if I drop something. I can't drive, I can't go up and down stairs unless someone is here to watch me. The one time that I did it alone, I fell.

So the healing process has been hard, the next step right now is physical therapy. I will start that on Thursday and hopefully that begins to help.

I must say our bodies are amazing, because these three little nerves are causing me such agony and making everything so much harder to do. I will get through it, but it is not easy. That of course I already knew being that I have been dealing with this since August 2011. 

Right now trying to find the positive in things is very hard, but I am really working on it. I try each day to look  in a positive light even though it feels so hard.

The end of the year and hopefully a new beginning

So long 2012, you were not exactly the best year in my 30 years on this earth, for countless reasons which I have been writing about in this blog for the past few months.

I am still so upset with my body and I fight every day to try and get that feeling to go away, but it seems to just get harder not easier. Yesterday I had to go shopping for some new khakis and I was so dismayed while trying to find something that fit and did not hurt at the same time.

I did manage 30 minutes of exercise on a stationary bike yesterday, first actual exercise of the year, that wasn't physical therapy... but boy did I pay for it later.  My goal for 2013 is to work out more and attempt to strengthen my body as much as I can to try and get through these diagnosis and problems.

I spent part of yesterday making healthy food to eat this week, so that I don't have to think too much about preparing breakfast and lunch if nothing else. I also did a lot of sitting around with heat and my Empi stym machine because I was in pain all weekend as well. 

So my goal is to keep a positive outlook for 2013. 

I look forward to a wonderful night tonight with great friends and welcoming 2013 which I truly hope and pray will bring a better outlook on life and a happier and healthier New Year not only for myself, but also for those people who have been there for me and who I am very honored to call my friends. Happy New Year everyone... CHEERS!

Catching Up

Well I am back to work and attempting to get my self back in order: sleep schedule, proper eating, exercise, and making some plans with friends.

I have a huge event coming up on January 11-13th, which I am not fully prepared for and I have to hope I can get through.

I cancelled my weekly appointment yesterday, because I just could not handle sitting in a car for 4 hours after that 9+ hour drive home Wednesday. It hurt me and I needed the treatment but I just could not do it, seriously though, my bladder really hates me.

What I did was went and picked up some supplies for my Empi unit to use to help calm my pain and spoke with my physical therapist that I will end up coming back for some treatments most likely here in the next month or so. I have a feeling I am going to need her at points. It was good to catch up with her and let her know how I was doing since I have not seen her since before my surgery.

Today I am trying to get some brackets done and listening to Les Miserables as I work. I am planning to see the movie this weekend.

Well time to get back to work I guess.

Recovery

Well my three weeks off of work has come to an end. Even though I did spend most of it sitting at home working. I am not sure how my body is going to hold up with everything just yet, but tomorrow I go back to work and on Tuesday I start my water PT,

I am both concerned and worried at the same time, I am not sure how I will be able to handle a 9 hour work day when I can hardly do most things for more than a few hours of going out, but I have to try.

The odd thing is the most I have slept since the surgery, and for as long as I can remember before has been the past two nights where I was actually in bed for 12 hours each, plus a nap today. That was a glorious feeling to not feel exhausted, but I still wake up with no energy.

All of this is just another thing to get through. My incisions are healing, they still hurt but they are healing which is good. I feel like this has been quite a trial in this journey, quite possibly the worst one yet.

All I can do is keep on taking it day by day.