I write this as I am getting ready to approach my 31st birthday this coming Sunday, and although I am not really keen on reading into horoscopes I decided to look at what this one had to say today: http://shine.yahoo.com/horoscope/pisces/overview-yearly-2013.html
I have been telling myself that 2013 will be my year. My lucky number was 13, my jersey number in high school was 13. I turn 31 on 03-03-13, so to me it seems like something sure is lining up, but then again it could just be a bunch of 3's. :)
My goal was I was going to get a tattoo for my birthday, but I have to wait until after surgery. It does have some of these components built in and it is truly me.
This year will be my year and I will make it through all of these trials and hurdles to ultimately succeed!
Wednesday, February 27, 2013
Tuesday, February 26, 2013
IC + Severe Nerve Pain = Disaster
I was thinking about this the other day and I realized that it has been just under one year since I was diagnosed with IC. I had surgery on March 29th and my condition worsened drastically, I then found a specialist and was diagnosed around April 18th with a long list of conditions starting with IC.
So nearing a year I feel as though I have been put on more medications to try and help, I am currently still seeking weekly treatments from my doctor and I still don't feel like myself. I have definitely had to become a stronger person this year. Although I know I am strong and can take on the world, this has really tested my mind and body.
I ran a large tournament in Minnesota this past weekend which meant plane travel and long hours, before the tournament started I had to ask the Athletic Trainer if I could have some treatment so I could make it through the day. So here I was before my own event on the table getting heat to try and calm my pain down and explain what was going on. I have to say I have always been blessed to have great Athletic Trainers around me, because of my job in sports, they really do a great job and are caring people.
I found this today and I wanted to share it because it is so true and it reminds me of this journey that I am on, especially as I look towards another surgery in early April.
So nearing a year I feel as though I have been put on more medications to try and help, I am currently still seeking weekly treatments from my doctor and I still don't feel like myself. I have definitely had to become a stronger person this year. Although I know I am strong and can take on the world, this has really tested my mind and body.
I ran a large tournament in Minnesota this past weekend which meant plane travel and long hours, before the tournament started I had to ask the Athletic Trainer if I could have some treatment so I could make it through the day. So here I was before my own event on the table getting heat to try and calm my pain down and explain what was going on. I have to say I have always been blessed to have great Athletic Trainers around me, because of my job in sports, they really do a great job and are caring people.
I found this today and I wanted to share it because it is so true and it reminds me of this journey that I am on, especially as I look towards another surgery in early April.
Monday, February 18, 2013
Sometime's it is the little things
I was thinking about this today and every now and then you just really think how am I going to get through all of this. Then something kind of hits you out of no where and lets you know that someone else has you in their thoughts enough to give you a call and check on you or send you a thank you note.
Today I walked into work and there was a handwritten thank you on my desk, completely unexpected but it meant a lot, even if it was a simple gesture.
Today I walked into work and there was a handwritten thank you on my desk, completely unexpected but it meant a lot, even if it was a simple gesture.
The Trouble with Travel
To any of my followers (if any of you are out there) with IC, you know that traveling can be a severe pain.... literally!
Saturday I was to make a 4+ hour drive to Ithaca, NY. I was packed and ready the night before I decided I would go to bed and get a good nights sleep, which I did. Then it hit me, I went to get out of bed when my alarm went off and I was struck with the wall of pain the minute I moved.
I had a bunch of errands to run and things I wanted to do and I just felt absolutely miserable. So that makes at least five of seven days last week that I really could not function properly. It is really getting annoying.
Either way I made the trip, the rental car I got had heated seats so that made the trip a little more bearable.
Sunday was a bunch of running around and I just felt horrible, then driving home again after the event didn't help.
Today I feel like a waste of space, my pain is up, my body just wants to fully shut down and I am fighting it every step of the way because I have to be at work and have to get things done.
This is no way to live life.
The good news: less than 2 weeks until my birthday!
Saturday I was to make a 4+ hour drive to Ithaca, NY. I was packed and ready the night before I decided I would go to bed and get a good nights sleep, which I did. Then it hit me, I went to get out of bed when my alarm went off and I was struck with the wall of pain the minute I moved.
I had a bunch of errands to run and things I wanted to do and I just felt absolutely miserable. So that makes at least five of seven days last week that I really could not function properly. It is really getting annoying.
Either way I made the trip, the rental car I got had heated seats so that made the trip a little more bearable.
Sunday was a bunch of running around and I just felt horrible, then driving home again after the event didn't help.
Today I feel like a waste of space, my pain is up, my body just wants to fully shut down and I am fighting it every step of the way because I have to be at work and have to get things done.
This is no way to live life.
The good news: less than 2 weeks until my birthday!
Thursday, February 14, 2013
This is really getting old
Well my surgery is less than 2 months away... check that is on the calendar.
Doctors appointments weekly... check that is still on the calendar.
Feeling miserable a lot... takes over my entire life!
The past few days have just been absolutely horrible, the pain was just unbearable even with the medicaitons and stronger medications. I feel like my body has surpassed the boundary of what pain really should be and it made it worse. I was so just overwhelmed I almost called and cancelled my appointment because I did not want to be in the car for four hours. I am glad I went and we are trying out another medication I hope that will help, but it will take a little time before we see any changes.
Of course I was asked if I could move the surgery up and I said not a chance, to any of my wrestling fan friends, you obviously know why. Speaking of wrestling we took a huge hit this week with the IOC, dropping wrestling starting at the 2020 games, which is just bull!
I feel like I am doing everything to just keep myself together and that is taking everything that I have right now. I told my doctor let's just get through the next eight weeks and then figure it out from there. Then I will deal with the surgery and what I am going to do about that. Not to mention in the middle of all of this is my birthday, I never thought this is what my life would be like as I was getting ready to turn 31. In all honesty I thought I would be married by now with the beginnings of a family. I guess you never know where life will take you, but I know part of that road it won't be taking me on.
But since I was 29 I feel like all I have known in my life is this horrible pain that just creates a black whole. Yesterday I told my doctor that I literally could not get out of bed, every fiber of my being said no. It was such a challenge. I am thankful that I have understanding doctors. As of April 18th it will have been a year since I first saw this specialist, and March 29th marks the first surgery that lead me into this spiral of life.
Well all I can say is that my hope is still that my 31st year on this earth will still be a good one to me.
Doctors appointments weekly... check that is still on the calendar.
Feeling miserable a lot... takes over my entire life!
The past few days have just been absolutely horrible, the pain was just unbearable even with the medicaitons and stronger medications. I feel like my body has surpassed the boundary of what pain really should be and it made it worse. I was so just overwhelmed I almost called and cancelled my appointment because I did not want to be in the car for four hours. I am glad I went and we are trying out another medication I hope that will help, but it will take a little time before we see any changes.
Of course I was asked if I could move the surgery up and I said not a chance, to any of my wrestling fan friends, you obviously know why. Speaking of wrestling we took a huge hit this week with the IOC, dropping wrestling starting at the 2020 games, which is just bull!
I feel like I am doing everything to just keep myself together and that is taking everything that I have right now. I told my doctor let's just get through the next eight weeks and then figure it out from there. Then I will deal with the surgery and what I am going to do about that. Not to mention in the middle of all of this is my birthday, I never thought this is what my life would be like as I was getting ready to turn 31. In all honesty I thought I would be married by now with the beginnings of a family. I guess you never know where life will take you, but I know part of that road it won't be taking me on.
But since I was 29 I feel like all I have known in my life is this horrible pain that just creates a black whole. Yesterday I told my doctor that I literally could not get out of bed, every fiber of my being said no. It was such a challenge. I am thankful that I have understanding doctors. As of April 18th it will have been a year since I first saw this specialist, and March 29th marks the first surgery that lead me into this spiral of life.
Well all I can say is that my hope is still that my 31st year on this earth will still be a good one to me.
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